Finding Your Geek Tribe

It can be lonely when you can’t find others to share in the things you love. Finding the right people to be in your life can help you grow, be empowered, and be a part of an awesome community. In this post you’ll see things to consider when identifying the right people who will be there for you, and ideas on where to meet people with similar interests.

Whether you have trouble connecting, relating, or even just meeting people who share similar interests, there are ways for you to be part of a community. Something that is vitally important is ensuring the community you become part of is supportive, encouraging, and inclusive. The wrong people can make you feel worthless or give you no validation; trust me, you don’t want that energy in your life. You are enough as you are – the right circle of friends will bring out the best in you.

Identifying Positive and Supportive Friends

The more people I talk to, and the more I consider this subject, I have noticed that certain factors play a part of how we develop friendships – life stage, experience, location, jobs, and interests.  Each influence our relationships and can bring people together or pull apart.  Some people meet others and stay friends for life.  For others like me, we wonder why it is so difficult for us.  There is nothing wrong with us!  Our circumstances, values, and passions change, and sometimes we grow apart from people. It happens.  Everyone is different, and our lives take different paths.  You also have to consider that maybe you haven’t found the best people for your geek tribe as well. It happens. Never take it personally.

We all need people we can count on and inspire us to be the best we can be. So how do we know we have those people in our life?  How do we become better at identifying healthy relationships?  In my experience, the factors I’ve mentioned play a big part of sustaining relationships.  Those factors give us things in common; things that we can relate to with each other.  People with kids relate more to other people that have kids.  Relationships can blossom at work because of the common factor of the job.  Things that you are interested or passionate about will connect you more to people than if you tried to build a relationship with absolutely nothing in common.  Being cognizant of these factors will help you identify how you meet or relate to people.  That is what helped me realize I needed to find groups to join that were founded on interests.  The people I have become close to have similar interest, life stage, or experiences that bonded us.  Next post I will go more into detail about how to get more involved and connected.

Once you find people in common factors, I challenge you to also think about the character of the people you meet.  Look for these traits- encouraging, supportive, honest, and effort.  Is this person encouraging, or are they constantly negative?  Are they supportive of my dreams and goals, or are they constantly dowsing my passion?  Are they honest and open?  Do they match my effort in this relationship?  Not everyone can be perfect all the time, and we are all human.  However, you want to make sure you find people who will challenge you to be the best you can be.  Make sure you invest time into people who help you grow and excel in life.  Iron sharpens iron. 

My point in all of this is that people change, grow and evolve.  Our lives take different turns, and sometimes people grow apart.  Sometimes it’s harder to find people with common factors to connect with.  Sometimes we prefer to be alone, sometimes we need support.  Now you have ideas to challenge your thinking about relationships, and what to look for in friends.  Just remember, that you are not worthless or weird, you just haven’t found the right people for your tribe.  Never feel bad about growing apart from people, they just aren’t meant to be in a certain chapter in your life.  Always remember though- treat others how you want to be treated.  Be the friend you want, and the right people will come to you.

Getting Connected

It’s all about being intentional.  You wouldn’t go to a bar looking for a caramel macchiato, right?  So, going to the right places will help you connect with the right people.  Below are some ideas on how to connect with others.

Comic Books Stores

This is a pretty obvious one.  One can easily go to a comic bookstore and find others with interests.  Most comic bookstores actually hold special events for author signings, meet ups, and other things. 

Geeky Bars and Coffee Shops

There is a rise in popularity for fandom themed bars and coffee shops.  These are places that cater to the specific niche of fandom and geek culture.  You can let your fandom fly and relax in a designated space for geeks. Coffee shops in general are a great way to meet people, especially if you aren’t into going to bars or clubs.

Comic Cons

Comic book conventions have been around for a long time.  Vendors for comics, fan gear, and panels about everything comics come together.  Many fans dress up as their favorite characters.  Many fans travel across the country to attend conventions to meet their favorite celebrities, authors, and display their costume designs.

Social Media

Social Media platforms like Facebook and Instagram are great ways to connect.  You can connect with people who follow certain celebrities, influencers, and other pages.  Facebook has many groups you can join.  If you are introverted like me, this way of connecting can help you avoid social anxiety.  Make sure if you meet anyone online in real life, please do so in a public place that is safe, and never alone.

Fan Events for Movies

Many movie theatres hold special viewings for fans to watch movies.  There are marathons and special fan viewings.  Going to one of these for your favorite movies will connect you with people of similar taste in movies. 

There are so many ways to get connected, but these are just a few ideas to get you started.   You can Google comic shops, cons, and movie events that are near you.  You can easily search a hashtag on social media to search for others.  Just take a leap of faith and open yourself to the idea of meeting new people.  Comment below with other ways to connect with others and find your geek tribe!

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